The Quarrel
by Zang
Summary: Misaki’s fit of jealousy led the boy and his boyfriend to a quarrel.


**The Quarrel**

**Summary:**

**Misaki's fit of jealousy led the boy and his boyfriend to a quarrel.**

**All disclaimers apply.**

Xxx

Misaki often wondered why Akihiko loved him. Was it because he was good looking or some sort? Was it because he possessed stunning visage and enchanting personality? He snorted cynically at the thoughts.

The answers were absolutely no.

He realized that he was just a normal boy. Mediocre perhaps. He was not tall nor handsome. He wasn't the centre of attention. He was small, angular and…simply plain.

So, why could a famous and gorgeous man like Akihiko fall in love with him, who could think of nothing to offer to the man?

Without hesitation, Akihiko countless times declared his blatant love. Just by the declaration alone, Misaki was already content. Although, there were times when a small part of him questioned his stand in his lover's life.

Misaki wasn't Akihiko's first love. He knew that. The fact that the ten-years-older-man had loved Takahiro for God only knew how long troubled him. Misaki felt nothing but ashamed for being jealous over his brother. It was already bad enough to be jealous to the very brother who had willingly sacrificed his education and youth to raise him. Alone. "A child raises a child." That's what people had said for the situation..

Xxx

Akihiko was not a kind of person who took everything to heart. He never let everything –be it pressing matter or any other issues- get the better of him. But it was different story when it came to Misaki.

His source of the troubling thoughts was his young lover. He might be a cold and ignorant person but he was not a fool.

Akihiko noticed Misaki's quiet demeanor. The Misaki he was familiar by heart was energetic and optimistic. This low spirited and gloomy boy was stranger to him.

The 29-year-old man rubbed his temple, stirring his recollection and questioning since when his high spirited boyfriend had become grim.

It had started since Takahiro's visit.

The frown on Akihiko's temple got deeper. Ah. Before that, Misaki had been as cheerful as ever. But gradually, as the visit became almost regular, the boy grew quieter.

Lately, Takahiro often dropped by the apartment. Sometimes he was alone, but most of the time, he came by with his wife.

Akihiko started to wonder. Was it because of Takahiro that Misaki's behavior altered? But why? He knew how dear the boy worshipped his brother.

The man shook his head. No matter how hard he thought about it, instead of finding the answer, he became more puzzled.

Geez. Misaki was definitely troublesome.

Speak of the devil, the boy just entered the living room.

"I thought you were working, Usagi-san," Misaki greeted him.

"I was," Akihiko responded tersely. "But before I got distracted."

Misaki stopped brushing his hair. Drops of water dripped down his face. "Distracted by what?" he genuinely asked. Curious was evident in his voice.

"Your recent behavior."

Misaki paled. Colors were drained from his face. Did he notice it too? Misaki gulped.

"Nothing's wrong," Misaki remarked in a low voice, not convincing both men.

"You're not yourself," Akihiko pointed squarely.

"Th-that's just your imagination."

"You lie," Akihiko got up, calmly strode towards the smaller lad. "I'm not a fool, Misaki. We'll discuss about it, later after Takahiro goes home."

"Brother is here?"

"Not yet. He's coming soon."

Xxx

Not long after that, Takahiro came.

Misaki happily hugged him.

"Misaki," Takahiro chuckled amusedly. "Don't act as if you haven't met in for long time."

"But I truly missed you," Misaki's voice was muffled.

The youngest Takahashi buried his face at the front of Takahiro's sweater, trying to appease his inner turmoil. He wished that by doing so the bad feelings for his dear brother would be gone away.

"What a touching bond, eh?" Akihiko feigned a cough.

Slowly Misaki detached himself. In an instant his heart was clouded heavily. "I-I'll make some tea."

Now Akihiko got a certain feeling that something was very wrong. In the moments during his friend's visit, Misaki would withdraw himself, either resigned to make beverage or even the oddest thing: the boy left to watch tv. Misaki simply let the older men have a chat without him. Seldom did the boy bother to interrupt or participate in the conversation.

Xxx

Silently Misaki walked to the kitchen. He couldn't stand to be in the same room with his brother and Akihiko. Something sharper than a dagger instantly sliced his heart the moment he saw bright gleam dance across his lover's eyes while the man was talking to Takahiro. Sometimes, Misaki took a note, they were calculating and in deep reverie, as if considering something. In rare moment, he felt Akihiko fought to free himself from something Misaki couldn't decipher what.

It pained him to the core to endure this jealousy. He remorsefully regretted for having that feeling. He couldn't help it.

For some time Misaki simply stood in silent. He took a deep breath, striving to suppress his thunderous heart.

While composing himself, Misaki walked back to the living room. He had decided that he would dismiss whatever heartache that ate him. He didn't even reach the room when his resolve broke at the sight before him.

Xxx

Takahiro flashed his friend a bright smile. "My life is already complete," he exclaimed merrily.

"Why is it so?" the silver haired man responded.

"Look, Akihiko," Takahiro continued. His face radiated joy. "I have a good job, a beautiful wife, and soon I'll have a child. Life can't be happier."

Akihiko nodded approvingly. Seeing his friend walk on air brought happiness to him.

"I can't ask for more," his smile was kind. "I pray you will find love and be happy as well," sincerity was clear in his tone.

Akihiko's orbs widened. For a telling moment, something warm filled his heart. He added his reason-list why he had loved the overjoyed man before him. Takahiro was a mighty airhead and damn naive when it came to some issues –and his younger brother too- but he was very kind. He had been the most precious person. However, Akihiko smiled, that had been before Misaki –without any warnings- intruded his life.

"Ah," Takahiro got up. "I promised Manami I wouldn't be long. Could you please tell Misaki I should leave earlier?"

"Don't worry about it, I'll tell him. Takahiro.." Akihiko hugged him tightly.

Takahiro was astonished. Only in rare moments did his best friend hug him. Nonetheless, he patted him.

"Thank you," Akihiko spoke softly. "Thanks for your prayer. I really appreciate it."

Inwardly he was grateful that the prayer had manifested. He had already found his true love, in a boy ten years younger than him, with dark hair and brilliant eyes.

_/Life couldn't be more beautiful than it already is, and I won't ask for more/_

He tightened the hug for the last time before releasing the brother of his lover. At that very moment, his eyes fell to a lone figure standing at the door.

That figure was stiff. Pain, sorrow and hurt mixed in those emerald orbs, making his heart ache just seeing those dejected expressions on Misaki's expressive face. He was taken aback noting those eyes already watered. Before he could recover, the boy dashed upstairs.

Oh no. Akihiko was panic. No, that boy got the wrong impression.

"Akihiko, what's wrong?" Takahiro's voice filled with concern. "Like you just saw a ghost."

After reassuring that everything was okay and Takahiro himself was out, Akihiko scampered following Misaki's direction. Soon he found him in the corridor.

"Misaki," he panted, grabbing the boy's arm and turned him.

"I should have known it," Misaki's agonized tone was more than enough to drive Akihiko to the edge. "I should have.."

"It's not like what you think it is," Akihiko said hastily. "What you see isn't what you get."

Tears stained Misaki's face. The boy yanked his arm. "You never loved me. You still love my brother."

"No, you got it wrong."

"So what is right?" Misaki raised his voice. "I see it in your eyes, Usagi-san. The way you look at him. The longing in your eyes. How could you?" he shook his head. Chest still heaved heavily.

"Let me tell you. It's.."

"I have never known love before you, Usagi-san," Misaki cut him. His words silenced the older man instantly. "You are my first love-"

The older man was taken aback. It's one in a million chance that Misaki would tell he loved him. What Akihiko wouldn't give to hear those words spoken. To _him._ And him alone.

"Misaki, look at me," despair was evident. His voice held as much agony as the smaller one's.

"No!"

Desperately Akihiko extended his hand, only stopped midway by Misaki's shout.

"Don't touch me!"

There, finally the by looked up. Tears kept falling from his eyes.

More than the tears did him, his insides clenched painfully seeing the lost look plastered on his young lover's visage. What he wanted to do the most right now was wrap his arms around Misaki's lithe figure and kiss away the heartache endured by the boy.

There was finality in Misaki's tone. Usually the dark haired young man's protests about Akihiko touching him went unheeded. But not this time.

"Then listen to me," the silver haired man inquired.

"Why should I?" Misaki averted his gaze from the man.

Misaki's denial started to grate on his nerves. All his efforts went to no avail. Usually Misaki was easy to appease, and not hard to indulge.

"Stop acting like a child. If you're a man, give me a chance to explain."

Hearing the word 'child' drove Misaki up to the wall. He was terribly upset.

"I am childish, don't you think? So what?" he challenged his older lover.

"You are, if you don't stop throwing tantrums like a teenager does."

Damnit. Regret instantly hit him as the words just slipped his mouth. "I'm sorry Misaki. I didn't …"

"Fine. Find someone who is more mature and composed than I am. I'm still a teenager, did you forget?"

_/How could I forget that he is still young? Misaki isn't fully a grown up man yet/_

Fat drops were falling again.

Akihiko wiped the hot tears on the small face, but his hand was jerked away. If Misaki looked up, he would find his lover wore a broken expression.

"I love you Misaki."

"Liar."

"What should I do to make you believe me?"

"Nothing. Don't do anything. I don't ask you to."

The heated moment was gone. Akihiko didn't like the cold tone in Misaki's voice. He still preferred Misaki's yell, shout, anything than this eerie aloof tone.

Akihiko sighed. He wisely waited until the boy's sob subsided. Gently he grasped both Misaki's shoulders, and held them firmer when Misaki tried to escape.

"I love you," he reiterated. "I won't forgive myself if I ever hurt you or make you cry again."

"It doesn't make any difference," Misaki denied.

"Of course it does," he emphasized. "You're the largest existence in my life."

When Misaki was quiet, Akihiko continued. "Takahiro is my past."

Involuntarily Misaki flinched.

"But my present and future is you. Will always be you."

Misaki closed his eyes, took a deep breath and slowly faced Akihiko.

"Your eyes told me the opposite," sad smile adorned his face. "You still love my brother. Unconsciously you still do."

Akihiko was agape with surprise.

"I notice it, Usagi-san. I'm not stupid. Everytime you look at him, your eyes shine brighter. They have this longing and soft spot. I am broken."

One of the man's hands rose and stroke Misaki's hair.

"Is this why you've been acting weird lately?" he took the boy's silence as 'yes'. "I've told you Takahiro is my past."

"Ten years of loving him is more than you can count."

"No," was the immediate objection. "A year with you is the most wonderful –and the best- thing in my life."

The hand slid down to cup the soft cheek, gently forcing it upwards so that the green eyes met the other's.

"Do you know how I led my life before you came? Can you comprehend that a loveless life is a living death?"

Misaki kept his eyes to the man's.

"I don't know how I look at your brother. All I know is this grateful feeling that because of him, I met you. Nothing more."

"All that matters is you," Akihiko continued. "Only you can turn me up and down. You make me weak to the knees, and only you make me rise again and be strong."

"So, you don't love my brother..anymore?" agitatedly Misaki uttered the question.

"That's a rhetorical question," Akihiko drew the smaller boy into his arms. "Don't doubt me. You mean the world to me."


End file.
